Get the Soap

I have always known and lamented the fact that once Aubrey started school that she would come in contact with some unsavory characters, and learn things I didn't want her to know. But I was completely unprepared for the deluge of what we call in our house, "potty words" that have flown from Aubrey's mouth since she began kindergarten. Now I realize, she did find humor in bodily noises and functions prior to her entrance into public education, but really, we hear something in the ballpark or two or three potty words just in the cookies-and-milk phase of the afternoon, which is a significant increase. Most of the time, I just say, "let's not say those words" or "we don't talk about that" or something like that, or we just laugh it off, because, hey, some potty words actually ARE pretty funny. And most of them are fairly innocuous. Until, today. (And I'm probably being overdramatic about this, but, it shocked me).

To start off, let me just say, she has a habit of calling members of her family "sillyhead" or other such terms of endearment. Today, we went over to see Aubrey and Andrew's grammie and grandpa, who had recently returned home from a long trip to Utah. After we greeted them and sat down and Aubrey was being quizzed by her grammie about kindergarten, Aubrey made an off-the-wall remark, and in response, her grammie grinned and said, "you silly girl!" And then Aubrey, wishing to return the endearment, said to her grammie, "you silly butt!" !!!!!!!! I was more shocked than anything, since she has NEVER heard that word from me or Chad. We try really hard to keep to words like bum, rear end, bootie, etc., all of which are acceptable. Call me old fashioned, but that's the way I want it in my house. So after, "silly butt" came out, we had to stop that little conversation right then and there with Aubrey and pull her aside for a little chat. "Who taught you that?" we ask her, (sounding nice, but inwardly, hoping to discover who the little pint size perpetrator was) and "Do you know what that word means?" Aubrey of course, didn't, so we told her what it was, and asked her to please not say it, or call anyone an offensive word, especially her grammie, please. But unfortunately, the laughter that she heard upon saying it the first time, (which was more due to shock than anything, and which was quickly subdued), was too much of a temptation for her, and so she said it AGAIN! to her grammie a short while later. I decided it was time to get serious. I sounded more like my mom than I ever have in my life, when I said, "Aubrey, if you say that again, I am going to wash your mouth out with soap." Aubrey, weighing the consequence, asked me, "is it going to be yucky?" And since I was the perfect child in my youth, I never had to have that punishment, and therefore would not know, I told her, "yes. It is disgusting."

I haven't heard "the word" again tonight, and I am hoping the threat of having Ivory jammed in between her teeth and rubbed on her tongue is enough to deter her from saying that again. (A nice, wishful thinking sort of thought, I know. I'm the one who has to have the guts to follow through on it, though). But sheesh, it is only the second week of kindergarten! I hate to think what other words she's going to come home with. But regardless, I'll have a trusty bar of soap waiting. Thank you, Ivory.